Remember when you were young and asked, “What do I want to be when I grow up?” At that age, you saw no boundaries: you could be anything! But something happened on the journey of growing up. For most, interesting distractions occurred that captured your attention and led to habits (or more likely, lack of habits) that seemed valuable in the moment, but ultimately led nowhere: watching TV, hanging out with friends, chasing after a romantic interest, etc. Don’t get me wrong – all those things are have their place, but the habits (and time spent) pursuing them was likely all encompassing instead of balanced. If it’s fun to watch TV one night, why not watch it every night? If it’s fun to party two nights a week, wouldn’t five be better? And the process of falling in love is so all-encompassing that you can’t think of anything else.
To feed these habits, we discovered we needed money. Early in life (for most of us) our parents provided for our needs and many of our wants. But there was a point where they stopped supplying all of our needs or wants… so we had to earn it some other way. Because our distractions were all encompassing, we usually jumped on the first opportunity to earn a buck that presented itself. And rest of life settled into place from there.
Are you doing what you wanted to do? Are you the person you want to be? I am not asking if you are happy, or if you are successful… Are you who/where you want to be? For virtually everyone, the answer is no. For some of the more fortunate, your “no” is the recognition that the journey never ends, but at least you are on the path you chose. For those off track, you need to realize that it’s only you who can Make Yourself.
From vision to action
Great! Now you know who you want to be. What’s next? Invite me to wave my magic wand? No! Make yourself.
Make yourself get up early to exercise. Make yourself refrain from dessert. Make yourself refresh your resume. Make yourself read instead of watch TV. Make yourself apologize. Make yourself save the extra raise you received. Make yourself delay gratification. Make yourself take a stand. Make yourself…
Get it? The road to be who you want to be is made up of little steps and little decisions where you make yourself choose the right decision on the right path to be who you want to be. I know you want it to be harder than that, so that you can blame someone else, circumstances, or the creator for not being who you dreamt you could be. Sorry, that’s not how it works. You have to Make Yourself.